Written by Xiao Wei, 2021 Cohort
Valentine’s day is almost over. A common question presented in front of me today: what gift did your husband give to you today? I said nothing. We don’t have this custom to send gifts to each other on Valentine’s. What happened next? The person said, “Oh, it seems like your husband doesn’t have you on his mind”. I have to admit that I was offended at that time. But later on I understood people hold different views about celebrating Valentine’s day, and how they perceive our relationships.
As one of the most popular celebrations, young couples see it as a gift-giving occasion. I would like to make and educated guess: these couples may still be in the preliminary dating phase when consumerism shows as quite influential through brainwashing advertisement.
In my perspective, sending gifts to each other isn’t a must to prove whether a couple truly are in love or not. If gifts were needed, the relationship is probably so delicate that a gift could determine how genuine it is.
I agree to the fullest degree that love needs some sense of ritual. But as a marketing person, I know how many so-called promotions the merchants do on Valentine’s Day bring in several times more profit than in normal days. Maybe it is better to celebrate it earlier or later if you need some gifts to acquire this sense of ritual. Or maybe we can focus on another side of sending a gift, to create more surprise for your love. It is more demanding because the premise is that you must know exactly what your lover wants. It would help if you took note of the other’s preferences in your daily communication and sent it on a particular day for you two. It is my way to show my love and care. Love is for two people, and I prefer to keep it just between us. We stay away from the commercial celebrations. How about you?